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California divorce lawyer, California mediation attorneyDivorce and separations can be a high stress process between two individuals. If you add in a child, the level of stress becomes astronomical. Not only are you busy deciding who gets what as far as investment and finances, now you are tasked with determining your rights to the children with regard to visitation and custody.. The thought of deciding visitation is so overwhelming and incapacitating that many couples simply choose to stay together until the child becomes an adult at 18. However, there are thousands more who go forward and make the decision to establish child custody visitation rights. How do they make that decision?

Types of Custody

Before deciding who has visitation rights and what those rights are, parents must first decide who will have custody of the child. There are two different types of custody, these are legal and physical custody. Let us explain in further detail.

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California divorce lawyer, California family law attorneyAs parents, we try to do everything in our power to protect our children. In California state law, the determination of custody and visitation schedule revolves solely on what is in the best interest of the child. However, past a certain age, the child begins to have a significant amount more weight in the decision-making process, especially when it comes to child custody and visitation.

When the Child Decides

As parents, we know what is best for our children. However, there comes the point in their life when they begin to have wants, needs, and opinions that may differ from ours. It is a part of the growing up process, and our children will inevitably reach this point as we did with our parents. That age is different for each person, so who determines at what age this is an age appropriate decision? A few years ago, California resolved the dispute by setting guidelines for which to follow. According to California Family Code 3042, consideration will be given to the preferences of the child if:

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California mediation attorney, California divorce lawyerDivorce is emotional and stressful for everyone in the family, children included. Many times, children internalize their emotions and wrongfully blame themselves for the divorce. Thoughts such as, “I was bad, so my parent left us” or “They did not love me anymore either” race through their still forming minds. As adults, we know better, but it is tough for children to comprehend that the decision did not come as a result of anything they did, or did not, do. Additionally, if you share an infant child, the first year is imperative for long-term bonding. New studies show that overnight stays for children whose parents are divorced have essential benefits, leading many parents to change their child custody arrangements.

Old Beliefs

For a substantial length of history, it was the idea that younger children, especially under the age of two, suffer emotional damage by staying overnight with noncustodial parents. Psychologists believed that this time apart leads to the breakdown of consistency, trust, and security leading to irreparable harm to the parent-child relationship. Researchers concluded that infants and toddlers needed to understand that you were there for them, every time, without question to build a healthy and lasting bond. They thought that a routine of sleeping in the same place every night with the same routine built trust and a sense of security, promoting better sleeping habits and enhancing self-soothing capabilities.

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Californian family law attorney, California custody lawyerWhen it comes to our children, we all strive to be the best parent we can be. We want the perfect house, a successful career, and to see our kids grow up to become self-sufficient and one day has a family of their own. These life goals do not stop once we divorce our spouse. Additionally, from a child’s point-of-view, the only thing they want is to know they are loved and supported by both parents, regardless of their feelings for each other. Based on this understanding, the first right of refusal is a clause found in many child custody arrangements.

What is the first right of refusal?

Whether it is for a 12-hour work shift or a night out with friends, not all parents have the ability to be with their children 24-hours a day, every single day. The First Right of Refusal (FROR) concept in California means that if one parent is unable to be with the child, the other parent is the first person contacted to watch the child. This right is afforded in the child custody agreement and is applicable to both planned and unplanned events. Parents utilizing this clause enjoy the benefits of:

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California custody attorney, California family law attorneyAccording to CDC, an estimated 6.7 million couples have difficulty conceiving a child due to a wide variety of factors. After years of failed attempts, many turn to alternative solutions to complete their family. One avenue increasing in popularity is surrogacy. Through this method, a woman carries the child of another individual or couple until birth, then gives the child to the parents. A maternal bond develops naturally during the nine month gestation period which can create complications after delivery. Occasionally, the original arrangement no longer suits the surrogate mother and a custody dispute ensues.

Forms of Surrogacy

There are several different forms of surrogacy that a couple can choose, usually depending on the issue hindering their ability to conceive naturally. Two of these options stand out among the rest. The two most popularly utilized are:

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