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Law Offices of Benita Ventresca408-395-8822
20 S. Santa Cruz Ave., Suite 212, Los Gatos, CA 95030
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“Bird Nesting” after Divorce

Posted on in Child Custody and Visitation

California family law attorney, California child custody lawyerBird nesting sounds like an idea meant for the local birdwatching hobbyists. However, it is actually a fairly new concept in child custody arrangements. It is a viable option for parents wishing to make the child custody and visitation arrangements as easy as possible for the children. While no situation is perfect for every custodial situation, this one may be a concept that should be considered by more families.

What Is Bird Nesting?

Bird nesting is a co-parenting solution that is extremely and uniquely centered around the children involved. Often times, divorce and custody situations can be painful and traumatic for everyone, especially for children. In most situations, children are moved around and often move several times during a year between two houses. They have two sets of friends, two bedrooms, etc. This new idea allows the children to stay in their home, and the parents move in and out of the house. Think of the adult birds leaving the nest, coming back and forth to the nest. The arrangement may be permanent or temporary.  The idea here is to create an easier life for the children and therefore both parents must agree to make the sacrifices necessary, even it if means making their own lives a bit more difficult.


This is still a new concept, but many psychologists believe that this is a solution that helps to create stability with the children involved and therefore results in a smoother transition into the divorced family’s lifestyle. Other benefits include:

  • One-bedroom set (also clothes, toys, etc.);
  • Less anxiety leading up to the switch; and
  • Spouse’s new house does not need to also accommodate children.


Of course, this situation is not for everyone. Spouses must be able to trust each other for sure. After all, each parent will need to be left alone in the home with all of the belongings. If you suspect that your ex-spouse may do something to compromise the integrity of the home or the possessions inside the home, then this may create more problems than it solves. Other situations that this option may not work with are:

  • Inability to financially afford multiple homes outside of the family home;
  • Ex-spouses cannot agree on parenting techniques;
  • The additional homes are too far from the main home making it a financial problem for travel; or
  • Work schedule prohibits travel to the family home frequently.

If you are in the middle of a divorce or otherwise are in need of a custody or visitation solution, it may be beneficial to discuss all of the options with regards to your circumstances with an experienced professional. With over 35 years of experience assisting families in the Los Gatos, San Jose, and Bay areas, attorney Benita Ventresca has helped many families reach arrangements that are best for everyone involved. If you are interested in speaking with a San Jose family law attorney, contact us today at 408-395-8822 for your free initial consultation.



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Los Gatos, CA 95030

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